Why I’m Not Everyone’s Darling: A Candid Look at My Vision

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Dear Reader undefined,

As Editor-in-Chief of B’SPOQUE Magazine, I’ve come to understand that my approach to art, culture, and social commentary isn’t for everyone. And frankly, I’m perfectly fine with that—at least most of the time. My goal has never been to win a popularity contest, but rather to provoke thought, challenge norms, and foster genuine connection through meaningful discourse and social interaction.

However, pursuing this vision comes with plenty of personal sacrifices: countless hours in front of a screen, navigating mean gossip, and maintaining a breathtaking pace. Sometimes, I even face severe headaches from external pressures and miss personal appointments.

But hey, thank you for nine years of challenges, inspiration, and the occasional inhumane humiliation if I misplaced a word or phrased a sentence incorrectly. Some of the comments I’ve heard and read were devastating at first, but quite funny in the end. No matter what, let’s end this war.

Are You Calling Me Arrogant?

My writings, particularly within B’SPOQUE, often delve into areas some might find uncomfortable or even controversial. Take, for instance, my exploration of “The Dialectic of Arrogance in the Artistic Sphere.” I argue that a certain level of self-assurance—what some might label arrogance—is not just beneficial but essential for artists to maintain their integrity and resist the pervasive forces of commodification.

This isn’t about promoting elitism. It’s about advocating for the unwavering conviction needed to create authentic work. We live in a world constantly seeking to dilute it. I understand this perspective might rub some the wrong way, especially those who champion a more conventionally collaborative or accessible art scene.

Ain’t no mountain high enough for the collective

But true artistic autonomy, in my view, demands this kind of unapologetic self-belief. This does not exclude collective efforts, as the magazine has truly been manifesting with the support of the collective within the years.

I’ve learned, even within my own community, we often need to sort out fundamental differences before we can engage with a genuine sense of manners and gallantry. Call me old-school, but I always have a reason to provoke and to evolve from the truths found in failure and misunderstandings.

Don’t Let Me Say: “I Told You So”…

I also don’t shy away from critical social commentary. One our featured articles “Hello Fascism… some important things to watch out for” is a prime example. I see the rise of fascism as a palpable and present danger, and I believe it’s crucial to speak directly and urgently about it. Emilia Roig’s voice has inspired me many times. It has affirmed that my thoughts are in sync with those of other authors.

When she points out the alarming trend of “critical voices slowly disappearing from mainstream media,” her intention is not to be alarmist. We want to sound a necessary warning. This directness, while perhaps unsettling for those who prefer a more subdued or apolitical stance on social issues, is, to me, a moral imperative.

In 2022 I myself have been writing about the unwanted rise of right wing policies. The result was a shit storm on all sides. And to be honest, navigating morals has always been challenging. Why are others allowed to do the same things without consequences?

Meanwhile, I have to apologize for the good I’ve tried to spread into the world? People have been scrutinizing my every move. They judge my appearance and behavior. They won’t stop until they’ve found something to blackmail me or push me aside. But this won’t stop me from following my path as an artist myself.

To Inspire or Not to Inspire?

B’SPOQUE’s mission, and my personal commitment, is to “craft fresh narratives in social and ethical discourse.” We aim and claim to consistently push boundaries. This means my editorial direction will naturally challenge traditional viewpoints. For those who gravitate towards more conventional or less overtly critical perspectives on culture and society, my work might feel too challenging, too direct, or even abrasive. And that’s precisely the point.

“There are more things in heaven and earth, …, than are dreamt of in your philosophy…”

We’re talking about ego and vanity here. To be precise, until a certain point in my life, I had neither. However, I’ve grown older and experienced the fact that not biting back would simply silence me and destroy the work of the dreaming kid at the age of fourteen, hoping one day this magazine would come into life.

Ultimately, my strength—and perhaps my perceived flaw—lies in my dedication to independent thought and my willingness to confront complex, often uncomfortable, truths. I aim to stimulate critical thinking and dismantle the status quo. Mine has been questioned several times, not just by my readers, also by my closest friends and my allies.

“A lie is sweet in the beginning and bitter in the end. Truth is bitter in the beginning and sweet in the end.”

DJ Kotze from the Track XTC

However, all this does not mean, that I would tolerate rudeness, cruelty or false accusations. If that means I’m not “everyone’s darling,” then I consider it a sign that I’m doing exactly what I set out to do, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Blood, sweat and tears went into this publication and I am proud as f*** for each and everyone believing in us!

All Images by Lians Jadan

Without art, cultures, the social engagement, and the commentary part, my work as editor of the B’SPOQUE magazine, wouldn’t have come to life. My personal vision and the accompanying challenges, my thought provoking honesty and the collective discourse, will always remain in fashion. At least in and for my beloved Berlin.

Sincerely your,
Alexander Renaldy